Tuesday, July 17, 2012

 i say confused thought,s, as of lately i really  have them. do you ever wonder how a disease like cancer, can strike several family member,s and let the ones you love die,, and not  you.. i am a twin, my twin died on our 49th birthday,, some type of skin cancer,, we both loved the sun,, he was a carpenter, i was a roofer. yes i am a woman, i have been married 39 year,s. together we have 4 grown married daughter,s and 12 grand children, 2 great grand children.,. life goes on, even in pain. my mom had cancer she passed away before her birthday in october 7 year,s ago. 7 monts after my mom, my twin passed, .8 monts after  my brother, my uncle passed, natural causes. 7 monts later my oldest brother passed  away, heart attack. i really felt we was cursed .5 loved ones  in less than 5 year,s. my son n law was killed on st patrick weekend 4 year,s ago. leaving behind a wife and son. how can life be so cruel,, my sister has become blind from dieabties, oldest sister has c o p d.. how can i be healthy.? just over weight some.. i dont understand how a loved one can be here in the night time, then die the next day.my mom all ways said, i was like the oak tree, standing tall, and letting others get confort from my shade, oak trees dont cry, they stand proud, holding in all there pain,, only crying there tear,s in the fall.. i all ways thought i was like a weeping willow,, strong enough to bend,, i have lived a life that i love, a family i love, home. i have  my dreams that are just dreams, i dont blame other,s for my short coming,s, sure i dont have a lot of money, most of the time i rob from peter to pay paul,, same as every one else. for 7 years i had a job that i loved, i dont have a job now, but we get by, i still love my husband after 39 year,s. sure life has its up and down,s,i have good best friend,s truthfulley,, i have a good life, and i am happy. i love god, and our country,,what more could a woman want..?? i want to know more about death,, is there a heaven,? can you really trust the bible.? with so many different religions,, who is the right god.?? gotta make you wonder,, becky c

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